A regular muggle living in an all to muggle-world, a little part of me died when I realised I'd never get to go to Hogwarts. I want to be 11 again. But it's too late, cause Severus Snape's already dead. So is Michael Jackson. Why am I always just a little too late? p.s. Cool blogskin eh?

I had to share this one!

joke no 1
You're the boss?
Any worker wants to take a day off?
Say this...

So, you want a day off??!
Let's take a moment to look at what you're asking for.
There are 365 available days for work.
There are 52 weeks per year,
Of which you have already have 2 days off each weekend,
Leaving 261 days left for work.
Since you spend 16 hours away each day from work,
That accounts for 170 days.
There are 91 days available for work.
You spend 30 minutes each day on breaks.
That accounts for 23 days each year.
Leaving 68 days available for work.
You spend one hour a day for lunch.
That accounts for another 46 days a year.
Leaving 22 days available for work.
You take 11 holidays per year,
Leaving 11 days available for work.
You take 10 days vacation each year.
Leaving 1 day left available for work.
No way are you going to take that day off.

joke no 2

1 Gan Wei Sheng, my assistant programmer, can always be found
2 hard at work in his cubicle. Wei Sheng works independently, without
3 wasting company time talking to colleagues. Wei Sheng never
4 thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always
5 finishes given assignments on time. Often he takes extended
6 measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee
7 breaks. Wei Sheng is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no
8 vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound
9 knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Wei Sheng can be
10 classed as a high-calibre employee, the type that cannot be
11 dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Wei Sheng be
12 promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be
13 executed as soon as possible.

Addendum :
To Operation Manager:
That idiot was standing over my shoulder while I wrote the repost sent to you earlier today. kindly re-read only the odd numbered lines.

From Admin Executive

LOL! =)